Disconnected to the world around me

What a wonderful week off had passed... Without working and drinking.. I feel so clean inside now.. As in I feel the liquid flowing in my body is blood and not alcohol.. Sufficient rest I had indeed but I was rather bored to death some of the days... Slacking and rotting.. Basically doing nothing...

Year 2010 pass really fast... Its faster than a blink of an eye.. It has indeed been a busy, fulfilling, alot of problems and memorable year for me...  Alot of things changed as I said in my previous post... My surroundings is a definate.. but for me I'm not sure if I had really changed.. I feel a yes and a no..

CNY is jus around the corner... It doesn't seems so excited anymore as I grow older... and specially now when I'm like the only one who is tagging along with my mom to visit my relatives... Come to think of it, it's rather boring... Its just like any other day...

My Sis and her baby moving back to their house this weekend.... Happy for her as she finally can bath, do her hair and nails... Bad for me as I'm really all alone by myself from that on... Everytime think of it, my eyes begin filling up with tears... I wonder y is that so.. Am I not happy with my life now?? It suddenly remind me of my conversation with my dad on the phone before he went back Indonesia.. We had a lil heart to heart talk and can feel that he's very worried abt me.. Be it my career, future husband, basically everything..  I almost teared when I heard what he told me... Was kinda touched as it's been a very long time since we chatted like this...

As y do I feel that I'm disconnected to the world around me... ??? I feel different... I used to be very bubbly, going out gather with friends or even chat with friends on the phone occasionally to catch up... But now besides work, I'm always home.. My phone ring mostly for work stuffs and hardly personal stuffs...It can be really quiet for the whole day at times... I'm really wondering y is it like that now... I feel so lazy to catch up with friends at times... I'm like totally in my own Candy world, putting signs up stating "Pls Do Not Disturb"..


I really need a short getaway asap... To breathe in fresh air, totally relax and pamper myself from top to toe.. And to find back Myself....